Why yes, Sir, I do have a(n everchanging) plan!

I have everything planned out. At least for the next, oh most likely, 10 years of my life. Or I think I do. I know the general idea of what I want to do, the outline, but don't know specifics:

Undergrad in 3 years, Med school, residency, fellowship, live a happy life saving lives and having a life.

 I've decided against taking a year off in between undergrad and med school after talking to a pedes surgeon who went to BU and BUMC. "If you CAN get in, please do it. Keep trucking." Good advice, I'd say. BUT that changes things up a bit for my in my plan making. I was hoping to take the MCATS fall and spring of my third year, which is normal, but for me it's my senior year, and the year when I'm doing all my applications and such. That starts to compact things a bit...and that's fine. BUT that means also no year off to get clinical experience and more volunteer work and find a job at a hospital. Which means I now need to get on that starting this fall. Which leads me to this pickle I am currently in:

 Do I stay on BUTF and squeeze that in, along with my overloaded semesters, along with volunteering and trying to get a job at the hospital? OR Do I leave the team so I can get the experience I need for getting into Med school?

I know the answer without hesitating, but I don't want that to be the answer. I mean, the team is my family. I am at ease with them, have made wonderful friendships, have experienced the real team-ness that I never did in high school sports, have learned what it takes to be a DI athlete, have learned how to train myself, different techniques for said training, and have learned more things about myself that I thought I would. I have also questioned my ability as an athlete, and realized that maybe I'm not top-notch, and that maybe I'm more cut out for self training. I don't really know. Maybe I've had the experience and that's enough?

 My mother has been telling me over and over again that I don't need to be on the team. I'm not going to be pursuing it as a career (and Lord knows that's the truth), I won't be going to the olympics anytime soon, and I need to focus on school as a number one. And that's true. But it's something I don't want to cope with!

I want to be able to do everything. Pursue everything I can. Get 4262462413857 degrees in everything possible, as well as be a surgeon, a family practice doctor, a pastry chef, a photographer, a vet, a marine biologist, and a famous cellist.  The doctor dream being the top priority. 

Anyway, ranting...

I do know that I'm not going to continue with track after undergrad, and it would be foolish to even want to. I know that I need a lot of community service and clinical experience to even be considered for medical school admissions (and especially if I decide to apply to an Osteopathic Medical school).

If there was a way I could make fantasy books real and somehow obtain a time turner (even though they were all destroyed), I would be very happy. Can someone jump on that for me?

Thanks. 

Anyway.

I don't know what to do. I mean, I do. But really, I don't. I don't want to be a quitter. I don't even want to quit. I want to do everything. I just wish that what was right for me would include time for athletics....

help!

On a brighter note, my first day of being Senior Guard down was successful. I love it. I love my pool (I thought I would hate it. How wrong I was!) I love the guards (so far anyway). And I believe this is going to be a great summer. 

I've started compiling a reading list with Bailey...So if you've got any good reads, let me know, please!

Oh Oh 'twas magic, you know.

Isn't it funny how quickly memories fade?
One minute you're smack dab in the center of the best time of your life.
The next? Still enjoying yourself, but you've long moved on.
I think it's so strange! When I scrounge around my memories and replay them, it's like watching a home video. I don't relive them, but rather I watch them as they happen. It's like I've forgotten what it felt like, what emotions I experienced, and it makes me wonder how I ever got into that? It all seems so strange, and almost impossible to experience things like that again. It's very similar to the feeling you get after watching a romantic comedy, like 27 Dresses, or How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. After you watch the path that Kate Hudson and Kathrein Heigl take, the way and the simplicity to falling in love, or at least experiencing something like it, it makes you yearn for that and wonder if getting there is that easy. It makes you wonder if that's what life is really like; it's like a dream.  I'm sure that's exactly what the writers and producers are aiming for, after all, but sheesh! That tactic works so well. And of course, then you get anxious, and start wondering 'hmm...what shall I do?' and 'does this mean so-and-so really could be for me?'

 Of course, that's all bullcrap, and just things your mind concocts, but hey, it's fun while the feeling lasts :P

 Bizarre!

Anyway, on a brighter note. Tomorrow is my last final of the year, now onto Summer. Oh, thank you for coming! How I've missed you so!  Good luck to everyone who is still in school (KU) and those here who still have finals (BU) !!

Cheers!